Wednesday, July 20, 2011

Speak Like A Parent

Here are some definitions used by experienced parents:
AMNESIA: condition that enables a woman who has gone through labor to have kids again.

DEFENSE: what you’d better have around the yard if you’re going to let the children play outside.

DROOLING: how teething babies wash their chins.

DUMB WAITER: one who asks if the kids would care to order dessert.

FEEDBACK: the inevitable result when a baby doesn’t appreciate the strained carrots.

FULL NAME: what you call your child when you’re mad at him.

GRANDPARENTS: the people who think your children are perfect even though they’re sure you’re not raising them right.

INDEPENDENT: how we want our children to be as long as they do everything we say.

LOOK OUT!: what it’s too late for your child to do by the time you scream it.

PRENATAL: when your life was still somewhat your own.

SHOW OFF: a child who is more talented than yours

TEMPER TANTRUMS: what you should keep to a minimum so as to not upset the children.

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